What is blogging? What is waiting? Than you ask yourself, what is lupus, really? It's a disease, and until now, it's never hit me that i have a disease. I always thought that, "Oh, something will happen and than everything will be normal." But now that i know nothing is going to change for the better on my health, am i just supposed to wait around and live my life around something that affects my organs? I want to live, not wait for someone to tell me how to live, how to eat, when to take medications!
Wouldn't you go crazy, being told how you're supposed to live the rest of your life just to avoid a rash or outbreak of your disease? I am going crazy, between daily stresses of life and trying to make an actual life of myself, waiting is not an option anymore. Maybe some people have better patience, hence why they can somehow understand this blog, but than i am not a patient person.
What do normal people wait for? The bus, the subway, the train.....a cute clothes store to open, their office to open, the alarm clock to ring.... What do i wait for? My doctors appointments at Dartmith, the appropiate time to take my steriods and immune suppressants, when i can put my special, sun-block cream on my face to prevent a rash. i must wait for blood work to come back and sometimes, when my disease flares up, i must put my entire life on hold just to wait out the flare-up. Sound normal to you? It should only sound normal to people if they themselves have an auto immune or life changing disease. nothing about my life is normal anymore, thanks to one genetic flaw.
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